Dating on line the pitfalls

As a social interaction, dating can be, in some ways, fairly intense. The classic scenario is going to a pub or restaurant, where you’re sat opposite each other, looking directly at each other.This is something you might not actually do that often with close friends, let alone complete strangers.A while ago, we might have come to believe someone was ‘the one’ because we spent enough time with them to really get to know them - and then might ask them out.Now, we might risk feeling that ‘the one’ is out there, but only if we trawl for long enough.Going on a date can sometimes feel like a fairly formal interaction: you meet up, you spend time together and, hopefully, you figure out whether you want to meet up again.Dating can sometimes feel like a means to an end: figuring out if you could work as a couple.When we don’t worry quite so much about where dating is ‘going’, what we’re left with instead can actually be a fun, useful and exciting experience.When putting yourself under less pressure to figure out what you think about this person, you may find you can just be yourself and have a good conversation.

But if we take that big objective out of the equation, things can suddenly get much easier.

When we meet someone in, say, a pub or at a party, we see what they actually look like, we hear what they actually sound like when they speak, and we pick up on their body language. Of course, real life interactions contain a lot of artificiality too - we all try to present ourselves in a certain way when out and about - but the level and nature of the details can be quite different.

As a result, when we come to meet someone that we’ve met online, it can take a while for that sense of artificiality to wear off.

Online dating has, in some ways, further complicated things.

This can put quite a lot of emphasis on presenting yourself in quite a specific and somewhat artificial way.

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Many of us enter the world of dating with some idea of the kind of person we’d like to meet.

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